The thought of sitting down and writing out your vows has got you stumped huh? A little pit fall in your stomach, sweaty palms and a bad case of writer's block. All totally normal.
There's an unspoken pressure when it comes to writing your vows that leaves you feeling as if you need to dazzle the crowd with witty words and heartfelt poetry. And yes, while that may be true to a certain degree, your vows are solely between you and your beloved. Your message, your promise, is simply about speaking from your heart in your own unique way. The vulnerability is what makes it a tear-jerker.
Starting is always the hardest part. But, hopefully with these tips you'll be feeling more confident and inclined to put pen to paper.
Search For Inspiration
To get the ball rolling, seek out inspiration online (other than the inspiration you get when you see your partner everyday - obvs). There are loads of vow examples and snippets out there for you to incorporate and make your own. Consider what style of vows appeal to you; traditional, humorous or emotional. Once you've found a few that you love, you can build a framework for your vows. And, if you're a MARRIED BY HANNAH LEA couple, I give you a handy dandy document jam packed with vow suggestions both funny and romantic.
Thought Provoking Questions
Take some time to reminisce on how you first met, what made you fall in love and what made you know you wanted to spend the rest of your lives together. It's time to get your creative and revisit your love story. These are reference points for your vows that you can include as you celebrate this new chapter together. Quite simply, all you need to answer is these 3 KEY QUESTIONS, and you've nailed it!
What do you love most about your partner?
What do you promise them?
What are your hopes for the future with them?
But, if that's still got you stuck, here are some questions to get you started (many of these can be serious or lighthearted).
What did you think when you first saw your fiancé?
When did you realise you were in love?
At what point did you know you wanted to get married to this person? Why?
What personality traits do you love about your fiancé?
What are some annoying, yet loveable traits?
What has your fiancé taught you?
What inspires you about them?
What does marriage mean to you?
What's your favourite thing about your fiancé?
What goals or values do you share?
How have they changed you? (for the better)
What do you most respect about your fiancé?
What have you supported each other through?
What do you want to accomplish together?
What does this marriage mean to you?
As a guideline, try to come up with a few promises to make your fiancé - make some broad in scope and others intimate and specific to the two of you.
Practice makes perfect! Say your vows aloud to yourself so you're able to ward off nerves when they creep in on the day. Your vows should be easy to say and conversational.
Your vows are made up of things you already know and love. Relax! It's a celebration affirming your commitment, so speak from the heart and enjoy the moment.